


Sugar and spice

by gentlezombie



Category: Some Like It Hot (1959)
Genre: Crossdressing, Multi, New Year's Resolutions 2012
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-01
Updated: 2012-01-01
Packaged: 2017-10-28 16:16:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/309706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gentlezombie/pseuds/gentlezombie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Frustrated with the first signs of marital problems, Sugar and Daphne take off on a vacation that yields surprising opportunities.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sugar and spice

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Ponderosa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ponderosa/gifts).



> Happy New Year! Let's start it with crossdressing Sugar.

"Let me tell you, Sugar, it's hard for an independent woman to suddenly find herself completely at the mercy of her husband."

Some of Daphne still clung to Jerry who was sitting in his shirtsleeves on Sugar's narrow hotel bed. Sugar noted that his ankles were crossed delicately, whereas she sprawled carelessly, propped up against the headboard. Well, there was no need for pretense here.

"You're telling me, Daphne. Joe doesn't seem to mind one bit that it's mostly Osgood's goodwill keeping us off the streets. Speaking of your husband, he didn't get you that necklace you were dying for, did he?"

"He said it wasn't outrageous enough. It matched my eyes perfectly!"

"Goes to show you men really aren't worth the trouble."

They sighed in unison. Sugar was starting to regret leaving her flask behind when she was startled out of a promising bout of melancholy.

"Men are so worth the trouble!" Jerry exclaimed.

"What are you talking about?"

"The ad I saw in the lobby said a male band from Chicago is looking for a player for tonight!"

"So?"

"Well, me and Joe played with them once and there was a bit of bother - all Joe's fault by the way - and I don't think they'll hire me again. They were looking for a drummer, anyway. The pay's real good, and there's a promise of two more weeks if it works out."

"And how does this make men worthwhile?"

"Don't you see, Sugar? We dress you up as a man and all our problems are solved!"

After months of sharing a house with Jerry and Daphne, the thought wasn't as outlandish to Sugar as it might have been. A slow smile spread on her face.

"I wouldn't mind some spending money of my own," she said. "That'd show Joe too."

"How are you with the drums, Sugar?"

"Pretty good, you know. My brother used to play but he couldn't keep a rhythm for shit."

"Sugar!"

"Oh come on, I need to get into my part."

"This will be easier than I thought," Jerry said, already congratulating himself for the excellent plan.

They would show the men that they could take care of things themselves.

 

"This will be harder than I thought," Daphne complained, eyeing Sugar critically.

"Come on and help me out, sister," Sugar snapped as she run the comb through her hair for the hundredth time to tame the curls.

"It's the proportions," Daphne said as if she hadn't heard her. "I think you have to keep the jacket on to cover your waist. And I've got a little something to take care of the other proportions..."

Sugar turned and saw what she supposed was a corset - only it seemed to work the opposite way, flattening what a regular corset would have emphasized.

"Where on earth did you find this?"

"Where do you think I got the breasts? All girls have their secrets, you know."

"You've got more secrets than most," Sugar said, but she was already undoing the laces. "Come on, help me tighten this up! I want to see how it looks."

It looked pretty good. Combined with the dark blue pants, white shirt and suspenders and topped off with a jacket, her curves were hidden effectively. Someone deceptively fresh-faced and innocent was looking at her from the mirror.

"I look like a boy," Sugar huffed.

"No helping it unless you grow some shoulders," Daphne said. "You look a bit on the younger side, that's all. How's the corset?"

"Trust me, I've worn a lot worse. It should be all right if I'm not challenged to a running competition."

"Try to avoid that, dear. You don't want to do anything too reckless."

"You went _swimming_ with us girls."

"Some of us are just talented."

The hardest thing was parting with her trusty makeup.

"Not even a bit of mascara?" Sugar asked, dismayed. She looked awfully pale and bland with her blond eyelashes and rougeless cheeks.

"You're pretty enough to get in trouble as it is," Daphne grumbled.

"Aren't boys supposed to get in trouble?" Sugar bit at her lip to get some natural blush on it.

"You're supposed to be a good boy, Sugar," Daphne said sternly. "No trouble, no drinking, no messing around with the girls."

"You're taking all the fun out of it!"

 

"So you're a drummer boy, eh?" the clerk at the managing office asked, clearly not impressed. "They want someone who can actually play. Someone who's reliable."

"No one's more reliable than my little brother," Daphne chirped. "He's been playing before he could toddle, the sweet thing. And I'm there to keep an eye on him all night!"

"I play the ukulele too," Sugar added in her deepest voice. "And I s-" Daphne elbowed her.

"No you don't! If you sing you'll blow our cover for sure!" she hissed, and without losing a beat, chimed at the manager: "Let's face it, mister, you're not going to get anyone else on such a short notice."

"Fine. You're hired."

 

They barely had time to stop by their place for Daphne to freshen up and Sugar to fret a bit before they had to head to the much more expensive and slightly disreputable hotel where the band was playing.

"My hair's curling up again, isn't it?" Sugar said, adjusting her hat again. "It's that one pesky strand that just doesn't want to stay put! Oh, dammit." All the pulling made the strand of hair curl up even more stubbornly.

Daphne stopped her by the shoulders. "Take a deep breath, dear. You look dashing."

"I don't feel dashing," Sugar said miserably. "I look stupid and these shoes are too big."

"Tell yourself, 'I'm a boy'. Never helped me much, but I think you're really cut out for this."

"For real?"

"Would I lie to you, Sugar dear?"

"You would," she smiled. "And it's Sam tonight, remember."

"Alright, Sammie. In we go."

"I'm a boy," she whispered under her breath and held the door open for Daphne.

 

All in all, it wasn't nearly as complicated as Sugar had thought. She had introduced herself as Sam, driven Daphne away like a boy embarrassed at having an apron with him, and no one seemed to look at her twice. Playing the drums was a piece of cake, though the dancing girls were a bit of a distraction. She'd never noticed the skirts were _that_ short when she'd worn one. At least they had their advantages. She was sweating inside her jacket and her shirt was plastered to her back. What she'd have given for that dress with the open back...

Then she noticed someone looking at her. It didn't count as looking twice, because the man never took his eyes off her. Sugar faltered a bit on the beat. What was a boy supposed to do? Sugar would've played coy, looked at him from underneath her impressive lashes, but that wouldn't work for Sam. He was seriously lacking in mascara.

Sam the drummer met the young man's eyes head-on. The effect was unmistakable. The man shuddered and seemed about to drop his drink. After that, he looked at Sugar only when he thought she didn't notice. Sugar wasn't sure what sort of a sign that was.

A good one, apparently, as the man approached her as soon as they reached the break.

"Good playing," he said and held out his hand. "Ted Willis."

"Thanks, Mr. Willis," Sugar said. The man was in his thirties and he had nice brown eyes, although he still looked slightly shell-shocked. "Sam Kowalczyk."

"Have you been with the band long, Sam?"

"I just started tonight," Sugar confessed, "and I'm a bit lost. I don't know anybody here." She ignored Daphne who was making pointed 'come here' signs from one of the side tables.

"We have something in common then," Willis said with a shy kind of smile. Sugar was sure it made women want to reassure him. "Can I buy you a drink? Us strangers should stick together."

"Sure, why not," Sugar said and followed him to the bar.

She would've liked to spice up the lemonade a bit, but honestly, she enjoyed Willis's company anyway. It was an old habit to check out a man's prospects. She found out pretty soon that Willis was an enterprising man and his father a wealthy landowner. Funny how the rich ones seemed to fall into your lap once you had a no-good husband.

His shoulder was touching hers companionably and she didn't think anything of it. When their fingers touched, she did think, very quickly. What would Sam do? She didn't know. Sam sure didn't feel like blowing him off. She entwined her fingers with his briefly under the bar.

"They don't need me for the next couple of songs," Sugar said as the band started playing again.

"I..." Ted cleared his throat. "At this point I'd ask you to dance."

"Why don't you?" Sugar asked. It seemed Sam liked Ted quite a lot. He was nice, respectable, even funny when he forgot to worry about doing something wrong.

"Isn't it obvious?"

"Not to me," Sugar said and took her new friend by the elbow. Something needed to be done to that crestfallen look. "Come on, let's go to the balcony. Just popping out for some air," she told a couple of players and Daphne in passing. Daphne looked like a sisterly intervention waiting to happen, and Sugar shot her a fiery look.

"What happened to no trouble?" Daphne stage-whispered at her back.

Then they were outside in the cool night air.

"What're you doing, Sam?" Ted asked in a low voice.

"I'm asking you to a dance," Sugar said. The balcony door was open for an inch and she could hear the first notes of a slow song.

She was worried for a moment when Ted placed his hand on her waist but he didn't seem to notice anything out of the ordinary. It was a good thing anyway, because he was taller and a way better lead than Sugar.

She wasn't sure why she was doing it, but why not? Something needed to be done about that perpetually crestfallen look on Ted's face. It didn't look good on him. No one should be that afraid of a dance or a bit of friendliness.

There was nothing wrong with any of it. Sam was enjoying himself, Sugar was having fun, Ted looked happy. The stars were bright and cold above them, the light spilling from the windows warm. She imagined they cut a pretty picture in their suits, too.

Sugar sighed quietly. It was just that Ted was awfully earnest, a bit too honest, way too good. Someone like Sugar needed a little spice in her life; and honestly, she was starting to miss Joe just a tiny little bit.

So when Ted bent Sam over for the last time and the last beats of the music faded, she tilted her head to look at the stars and said:

"Darling, I have something to confess..."

Maybe she could keep the suit.


End file.
